Yet another demonstration that 1. my noggin' works in mysterious ways and 2. there are people out there whose noggins (work with me here) are even more messed up. So, someone delivered what I thought was a really nice compliment the other day: "Those pictures from the other night were great. You are really photogenic!" Awwww, blush blush...."Thanks," I said. Jump to the following day during a long stare into an unflattering mirror. I do my best (and worst) thinking in the bathroom. And no, you stinky boys, not on the toit-ey....while getting ready. Neanderthals! This particular instance of deep thought was definitely leaning toward the "worst" category....cause here is the ridiculous theory that entered my mind: "I wonder if this person saying I was photogenic means that I'm really not that good looking in real life." WHAT?!?! I immediately wanted to unthink it but....too late...there it was. Poor girl - she didn't even know that when she delivered a heartfelt compliment that it would later be torn apart by my inner insecure fairy. Hmmm...need a different word. Fairies seem like they'd be confident all the time, no?
Anyhoo - there it is folks. Some stupid shit that only a woman would dare to think. I mean, there is not a snowball's chance in Arizona that a similar thought has crossed a dude's mind while contemplating a COMPLIMENT....a COMPLIMENT!!! What is wrong with me/us/women? Or is it just me? Nope - cause take a gander at exhibit A: What does photogenic really mean? and Exhibit B: You are SO photogenic Hopefully, those are the least educated discussions on the topic. I don't even dare quote some of these people. Just read for yourself and feel utter shame for the human race but know that green really brings out the color in your eyes and you take a really good picture. :)
Confused yet? A while back, I wrote a post about TV Pick Me Ups. "Friends" was the one show that could make me laugh when I felt like my little teenage world was turning inside out and upside down. In that same vein, we all have certain songs (don't lie...you know you do) that hold memories for us (good and bad)...some that got us through hard times and some that just make us snot-swipin' sad.
I feel like sharing these things is like giving you guys and gals a peek into the junk drawer of my life and you know how I like to over-share so here's my song list of days gone by. Please share your faves if you have some or, even better, those songs that you love to hate....and don't forget the "why"....that's the best part!!!
As always, judge away....you can't hurt me ;-).
Forever and Ever Amen - Randy Travis, 1987: Summer at Granny's house on a porch swing with my tape deck.
You Oughta Know - Alanis don't-piss-me-off-or-I'll-chop-off-your-wee-wee Morisette, 1995: A girl, a boy, another girl - 'nuff said. Tie: I Want A Little Sugar In My Bowl/Do What You Gotta Do - Nina Simone, original recordings vary but in this case, the year in question is circa 1998: Sophomore year in college on a grassy green knoll in Denton, Texas with a certain red headed older boy who fancied himself,well....a bit of an artsy drunk. There was flavored beer and sunshine - classes were skipped, time was wasted. Ah but wasted isn't the right word...I have him to thank for the introduction of Nina to my music repertoire and while I don't always think of that grassy knoll or that red headed boy when I hear her voice, I feel like music is better because she existed. I don't believe it's possible to drive around in an old Cadillac convertible without Nina on the radio ---- it should be illegal.
There You Go - P!nk, 2000 - On the way to some gay dance club in Dallas with a girlfriend (not THAT kind of girlfriend). Feeling empowered and strong and like I could very possibly stop driveling over this stupid guy I was in love with. Turned out it was a momentary lapse of sanity -- I stayed with said stupid boy for 5 loooong years. Still....at least P!nk made me think about dropping him like a bad habit. 26 Cents - The Wilkinsons, released in 1998 but true impact felt in January 2004: A penny for your thoughts, a quarter for the call, and all of your momma's love. What more do you need in a song to help keep you wrapped in love when you've just set out across the country to start your life....away from all of your family (especially momma)? There's a lot to this story but, my fair blogstalkers, I'm keeping this one locked up a bit....it's that special.
Broken Road - Rascal Flatts, 2005: Yeah, I know it's overrated as a love song and certainly as a wedding song but guess what? My way WAS narrow and the road? Broke as all get out. But everything, and I mean everything, I endured led me straight to this man that I love and while fate can be a hard thing to believe in, if you knew our story, you'd be hard pressed not to believe in true love. He's it for me and dammit...I earned it. The House That Built Me - Miranda Lambert, 2010: I miss you Granny.
Man...I could go on forever. But I want to hear YOUR playlist. C'mon...gimme somethin....
I wish I could go into all of the gory details because it would be an easier way to get to the point but the Internet is too damn available to too damn many people who might get their feelers hurt so I'll just say this: I am sick and tired of having to play nice with bitchy women. Bitchy might not be the right word. Maybe it's jealous, insecure, judgmental, passive aggressive, two-faced....or some combination of all of the above. Usually before I write about an issue, I will take a gander at what others have published. I'm fine restating what's already been said in a different way (it's hard to have an original thought in this day and age) but I tend to want to read supporting and counter arguments ... just to out of curiosity. When I did that for this post, I came across this "gem" (she says, in a drawl that is dripping with sarcasm): Top Ten Things that Make a Woman Threatening to Other Women. Fundamentally, the points made are pretty accurate but the suggestions the author makes to help your situation when you're the "offending" woman are just plain ludicrous. As if you should shelf your high heels, play dumb, be less beautiful, and not spend your own hard earned money....just to get other women to give you the time of day. Horse shit. I will admit that I have been intimidated by another woman's beauty or intelligence in the past but I have ALWAYS recognized that the fault is mine and unless the person is unkind, I will find away to get over my insecurities. Otherwise, look at all of the relationships I would lose out on. And ultimately, we are all different and beautiful in our own way so what does it really matter? But if I have a moment of insecurity, others have LIFETIMES. Years of practice scowling at the pretty young girl in the office - "well....we all know how SHE climbed the corporate ladder don't we?!" Or maybe they point out that the intelligent woman is a snob....."listen to that uppity bitch!" After enduring decades of judgment on sight - I.am.tired. I am perfectly willing to accept that there is such a thing as a first impression but I am also aware that WE ARE ADULTS. We should know by now that there is more to a person than what is on the surface...that if someone speaks her mind or offers an opinion, she's not attempting to threaten your livelihood or overshadow your own voice....she simply has her own voice. So sluts, smarties, bitches, and babes - let's all just get over ourselves and be friends. And if we can't be friends, ya think we could just live and let live instead of sabotaging each others' happiness? Life would be so so so much sweeter that way.
